axioms

The internet is a dick-measuring contest between nullified participants, with considerable rivalry and interminable adjustment and debate over the findings, despite the lack of anything to measure.

Furthermore,

The internet is now populated by the kind of people its original inhabitants went there to avoid.

(no subject)

Okay, somebody tell me how I'm supposed to respond to this email from my mother:

Do you have a Walmart Superstore,one that sells food in addition to everything else,near you?We had the grand opening of one just two miles down south from me on Rte.41.Shopping at Walmart is so convenient now.I find their prices to be the best on most things.Before this the closest one was on Cattleman Road,which just happens to be very close to my cousin Jimmy's house.He has a card for Sam's as well.I'm sure you've heard of that also,an affiliate of Walmart?Thinking of you---Mom

How do you break it to someone to whom a Wal-Mart Superstore is a novel and delightful concept that she is shopping with SATAN?

Incidentally, if someone from Wal-Mart reads this and borrows it as a promotional piece, you shall die by my lotion-stained hands.